"WAITING FOR MUELLER"...a Tragicomedy (with apologies to Playwright Samuel Beckett)

The story in which 2 characters, Vladimir & Donald wait for the arrival of someone named Mueller who never arrives...or it just seems that way.

Two lost souls; one suicidal by Coke, the other likes Wodka!

A COUNTRY ROAD AT EVENING NEAR A TREE WITH NO LEAVES.

VLAD

Why are you wandering?

DONALD

Nookie.  You?

VLAD

Nerve Gas.

DONALD

Keep walking!

ALONG THEIR JOURNEY THEY CROSS PATHS WITH THE DONKEY & ELEPHANT.

DONALD

Pretend you don't see them.

VLAD

Ha - piece a Babka.

DONALD

Same here - 'President of Donald'...I could stand in the middle of Fifth Avenue & shoot som...

VLAD

I know, I know - but I did!

WEARY, THEY STOP TO SIT ON A TREE STUMP.

VLAD

Describe this Mueller fellow we're looking for.

DONALD

Well, he has hair, damn it & he's a Third.

VLAD

A third of what?

DONALD

His father & grandfather have the same name...how boring.

VLAD

Your son...

DONALD

Oh, Mr. DirtonHillaryIloveit son?

VLAD

Ha ha.  Ah, children - we have Siberia for that!

DONALD

Hey - you were supposed to make Hillary win ...I just wanted the publicity.

VLAD

Who cares!

DONALD

I care - Melania sewed my Fly shut; all my pants!

VLAD

Your Family Jewels are safe with me.

DONALD

And, my Rubles?

VLAD

Yes & the Pee Pee Tape.

DONALD

I knew you'd be someone I could trust - do I have great instincts or what!

VLAD PULLS OUT A FLASK & OFFERS DONALD A SWIG.

DONALD

Well, I don't usually...

VLAD

...You wanna be a Dick or a Dictator?  To Life...Terms!

DONALD

Yes, to Life Terms or The Wall ...whichever comes first!

AS NIGHTFALL DESCENDS ON THESE TWO DOWNTRODDEN ULTRA-RICH MEN; THERE'S ONE THING THAT PERSISTS...

...NO SIGN OF Godot or Mueller!

***

Views: 108

Comment by koshersalaami on April 12, 2018 at 6:21am

Possibly your best work

Comment by alsoknownas on April 12, 2018 at 8:00am

Ok. Not bad, but I was hoping for comedy, not a fact riddled hit piece.

Comment by Rosigami on April 12, 2018 at 8:10am

Excellent. I can't usually laugh at our ongoing current political comedy, but your piece did it for me.  

Comment by J.P. Hart on April 12, 2018 at 8:37am

that the quip team writers of John Goodman's resurgent prime time komedy send over a limousine for 'ya
heart and soul!
Say it ain't so!

JPH
still feelin' clever that I reported to the draft board with no shirt, no shoes . . . shucks this site is slower than the Paris Peace Accords circa whatwasIT
'71 through 2018?
sent via mental telepathy,
Highway Harry's, WI

Comment by marilyn sands on April 12, 2018 at 9:21am

Thanks so much Kosh!  They're on the run!

Comment by marilyn sands on April 12, 2018 at 9:23am

Thanks so very much, FoolishM!  We're all doing more than 'Waiting' - some of us have ulcers!

Comment by marilyn sands on April 12, 2018 at 9:25am

Thanks so much aka!  ha ha I think we have 'Him' pegged - are the Repubs far behind?

Comment by marilyn sands on April 12, 2018 at 9:35am

Aww...thanks so much Rosi!  I'm just a 'Broadway Baby' who got side-tracked by this Political Tornado. 

Comment by marilyn sands on April 12, 2018 at 9:45am

Thanks so much J.P. Hart!  I'll take all of it to Heart!

Comment by mary gravitt on April 12, 2018 at 12:47pm

Becket would be proud.  We have to take the foolish things of the world; crazify ourselves and wait Trump out like we did the rest of the bad guys who thought they were gods.

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