Televangelist Jim Bakker Demands Viewers Buy His Pancake Mix

Televangelist Jim Bakker Demands Viewers Buy His Pancake Mix:  Disgraced televangelist Jim Bakker warned viewers that their grandchildren could face eternal damnation and President Trump possibly be assassinated unless they send him $60 (plus shipping and handling) for a bucket of the pancake mix which he is selling.  All I can say is, let this serve as a warning to all of you who think you can just eat at IHOP once in a while and still save your souls - the Lord isn’t fooled by that kind of crêpe.  In fact, I’m been thinking about designing a custom griddle that'll put the image of Jesus on all these pancakes.  That ought to butter him up a bit.

http://www.johnnyrobish.com

Franklin Graham Attacks Ray Moore Denouncers:  According to Evangelist Franklin Graham, those denouncing alleged pedophile and Alabama senatorial candidate Roy Moore “are guilty of doing much worse than what he has been accused of supposedly doing.”  Smart observation on the part of Reverend Graham.  I mean, if Alabama doesn’t elect this pervert to the Senate, next thing you know - hordes of transgenders will begin using public restrooms and our young people could be at risk of not believing everything they hear on Fox News.  Give him a break, the good pastor is only trying to give loyal Alabama Republicans a little Ray Moore of hope.

http://www.johnnyrobish.com

Florida Man Accused of Impersonating Cop for Discounted Doughnuts:  Florida police have arrested a man who was impersonating a cop so he could get discounted doughnuts at Dunkin’ Donuts.  Police say it was easy to spot the imposter by the glazed look on his face.  But there’s no point in sugar-coating this, this guy is going to jail and they’ll likely throw him right in the hole.

Views: 94

Comment by alsoknownas on November 19, 2017 at 7:36am

Bakker's syrupy voice is too much to swallow even when he isn't selling pancakes.

Comment by Johnny Robish on November 19, 2017 at 7:40am

Hee!

Comment by Arthur James on November 19, 2017 at 8:06am

`

he still wed

to

Fanny May?

he ought to read

the OT Book of

Job? he `ought'

to sell on DC's

steel?

STEAL?

PAVED

`

CONCRETE

oops

streets

rubber

flip

flops and

make honest

lifestyle...

`

Ron Powell may

br related to?

Adam Clayton

Powell?

gads...

`

I repare?

prepare 

dinner

for returning

Farmer

Marketer...

`~`

~!

~

they get

'grouchy

if hungry.

`~'`~`

`...~

`

Comment by J.P. Hart on November 19, 2017 at 9:18am

I gotta get out of WI.  This time of year, you hafta have a dead deer bungeed cross your fender to be 'in' with the powers that be.

Ontheotherhand, if all the dudes are way up north . . . .there's no place like home for the holidays!  Maybe i need something sweet. Cuffed crimson dockers and a lime T? Maybe just text Ajax Liquors: Bottles or cans? Yes. Maybe xtown bus to the zoo?  There's a gin mill (not far)....the last one with Pet Clark on the jukebox. . .yeah that's it! Lady there resembles Brenda Lee!  She'll go, "How are 'ya". "Goot!" "Scotch & soda?" "Yeah, please...mind if I play 'Come Monday?'

Comment by Johnny Robish on November 19, 2017 at 12:54pm

Thanks for your comments my friends!

Comment by Arthur James on November 19, 2017 at 1:01pm

`

thanks..,.

i8 am in no comment

'mood. i act as if i in a

comma. I just sad? said

good bye to my

Granddaughter

etc

She is headed to

Tennessee

to eat Turkey

Bird with

outlaws

&

In-laws.

`

She gave me

sweet bakery

pastries.

`~`

~,~

`

She a Hoot!

Adorable...

Aye Yeas!

`!~`

`

Comment by Boanerges on November 19, 2017 at 3:07pm

Too late, Johnny: Someone beat you to it.

(Shamelessly stolen from Fark)

Comment by koshersalaami on November 19, 2017 at 3:49pm

In his context I always associated "pancake" with Tammy Faye's makeup

Comment by Johnny Robish on November 19, 2017 at 5:45pm

Damn - and I already had plans to sell it on e-Bay and had a house all picked out in Beverly Hills.

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