Stem Cell Brain Implants Could Slow Aging Process in Humans: Scientists announced they have slowed down the aging process in animals by implanting stem cells into the hypothalamus region of their brains, raising hopes that implants into the “almond-sized” hypothalamus of humans could help combat age-related diseases and therefore extend the human lifespan. In related news, Trader Joe’s has almonds on sale all this week for just $4.99 a pound, but researchers caution that while this may be a great bargain, there’s no hard evidence that purchasing discounted almonds at Trader Joe’s will do anything to increase the human lifespan.
Half Our Bodies’ Atoms Formed Beyond Milky Way: Astronomers say nearly half of the atoms that make up our bodies may have formed beyond the Milky Way and traveled to our solar system on intergalactic winds driven by giant exploding stars. Yea, and a good portion of the other half of our bodies formed because we ate too many Milky Ways.
Man Accused of Smuggling King Cobras in Potato Chip Canisters: A Los Angeles man has been arrested after federal prosecutors say he arranged to smuggle three highly venomous king cobra snakes into the United States hidden in potato chip canisters. What I wanna know is, who’s job was it to stuff the snakes into the potato chip canisters? Talk about coming through when the chips are down. I suppose it goes without saying that he told the snakes “I bet you can’t eat just one.”