Sinkhole Formed on White House North Lawn: A small sinkhole which began forming on the White House north lawn this past week is being monitored by security to make sure it doesn’t pose a threat to the occupants and staff. Sink hole? My guess is it’s Melania - trying to tunnel the hell out. She probably figured it worked for El Chapo, so its worth a try.
Giant Predatory Worms Have Invaded France: Biologists warn that giant predatory Hammerhead flatworms, which grow to a foot or more in length, have invaded France. Now, I guess the only question that remains is has France offered its unconditional surrender and turned over all government functions to the worms yet?
Asteroid From Alien Star System Spotted Near Jupiter: Scientists say they have spotted an “alien” asteroid which they believe is from another solar system, and its orbiting our sun in the wrong direction. Now wait a minute - just how the hell is some asteroid from another solar system supposed to know what is the “proper direction?” There’s no directional signs out there!