Remember when 'Breaking News' was an Earthquake, a Wild Fire or a President choking on a pretzel?
In this White House, we need a scoreboard on who quit before they got fired, who got fired before they quit & who came in on Monday, forgot they quit & then got fired!
Sometimes I feel like I'm on the Chocolate Assembly Line on the "I Love Lucy" show - but I'm twice as fat!
"Today Reagan said, 'Sex sure - Mommy promised after naptime we'd play Pee Wee's Big Adventure' "!
But, there's no 'Stop the Presses' - not on Donald Trump's Watch. Everything's moving too fast!
We can't dawdle, can't spellcheke, can't even call Siri...this morning's Trump meltdown is this afternoon's expired copy & already in the crapper!
See that - now they call it a shredder!
No, I can't keep pace with the Breaking News - I'm still workin' on 'Christie Fat Jokes'!
I'm so out of the loop - I don't even have time to find out Kim, Kendal or Khloe's latest Pregnancy Test's results!Today - everybody's on 'POTUS Resignation Watch' - with the exception of Mike Pence who wants to stall - as the drapery swatches haven't arrived yet!
And 9 out of 10 people think Bob Mueller is taking too long - the 10th person, of course - is Trump!
Remember when a Probe was held by a professional wearing a 6 finger glove? No wonder Mueller's taking so long - Trump won't stand still!
And, he's getting fitted for a Statue!
But, we humorists really do have a writer's obligation to keep track - making fun of the hypocrisy, the corruption, the injustices & the money launderings - and that's just while doing my 'whites'!
Don't laugh - I'm up a buck, fifty!
Yes, in the Trump Era, our latest work instantly becomes obsolete before the editor even presses the publish button. He did what?
Happy to say this can also be seen in "Humor Times Magazine" but with ebay Ads for "Melania's Flood Pumps"!