Putin Orders 755 Personnel Cut From U.S. Missions

Putin Orders 755 Personnel Cut From U.S. Missions:  In response to new U.S. sanctions, Russian President Vladimir Putin ordered that the U.S. diplomatic missions in Moscow and elsewhere in the country will have to cut 755 staff members.  Putin said under his new directive, senior diplomatic staff will be cut with sharp, pointy objects, while lower functionaries will only receive paper cuts.


Outback Steakhouse Accused of Being Satanic:  Outback Steakhouse is facing a PR nightmare after a fundamentalist Christian went on Twitter and posted a graphic with lines drawn connecting Outback Steakhouse locations in several cities that appeared to some to form a pentagram, causing many Christians to conclude that the restaurant chain is satanist.  The situation only worsened at a press conference Outback called to deny the allegations when someone called out “you’re devil worshipers” and the Outback spokesperson yelled back “like hell we are!” 


Regular Alcohol Drinkers Have Lower Risk of Diabetes:  According to a new study that looked at more than 70,000 Danish people, those who drink small to moderate amounts of alcohol on a frequent basis are less likely to develop diabetes than people who don't drink at all.  Now, of course I’m no medical professional, but just on the surface - I’d have to say drinking sounds like it would be a hell of a lot more fun than diabetes.

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Comment by Boanerges on July 31, 2017 at 2:06pm

JFC on a farking skateboard. Ya know, the fundies really, seriously, need to get a life. And I'm WAY ahead of the Danes. Just sayin' I won't need to be embalmed. (Although cremation may cause some problems.)

What's your take on the Mooch getting turfed today? Maybe he'll get to spend less time with his family?

Comment by Johnny Robish on July 31, 2017 at 6:15pm

I believe he wanted to spend more time lying to his family!

Comment by koshersalaami on August 1, 2017 at 4:11am

Shades of Procter and Gamble 

Comment by Ron Powell on August 1, 2017 at 5:38am

Many, if not most,  of the 755 are Russians. 

Putin's probably doing us a favor.

Comment by koshersalaami on August 1, 2017 at 6:18am


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