I'm cold.  Middle of August and I am cold.

Old lady Nel was told she would be living here today.

The crying was unbearable.  Nel heaved and twisted and turned calling out, "I want to go home!  Take me home with you!"

Her niece which is all the family who cares doesn't care.

We all are faced with this reality that this place has become home, even for those who go home.  They always end up coming back.

The crying I can understand until it is done for the effect along with chocking and gagging.  Nel has mastered all of the special effects to a precise formula.  I can't stand her.  She makes my skin crawl and my stomach churn. 

The niece is horrible to her and I can honestly see why.  I would also bet the whole family is fucked up.

The niece always has a man with her that is hunched over  and appears to be older. I like him. She has a couple times made it clear that he doesn't buy Nel's bullshit.

Nel plays a game that she is hard of hearing.  The other day the niece kept repeating, "do you want us to bring in you chair?"

Nel would respond, "huh?"

After six huh's, out of nowhere the old man roars, "Do you want your chair?  Did you hear that?"

Anyone within earshot was laughing.  Everyone including the niece and old man.  Everyone but Nel.

Its like a movie  where certain moments of clarity happen over and over again and you promise yourself each time that this time will be different.

Without even trying I have fallen off the grid. When you become disabled and or just old and you are housed in some nursing home rehab that is really just a house full of crazies that don't quite have quite enough money to live free you are  taken over by the state.  The irony is that the government is incapable of doing anything and the handling of the paperwork means a lot of times things are not kept up to date. In my case and the various bought with lapses of time and my coma everything become out of  date. 

The one thing that the coma did accomplish was that I became humble.  here I once had been an incredible ass, I now became a loving carefree spirit.

Views: 121

Comment by J.P. Hart on October 14, 2017 at 3:04pm

Kind Sir Mr. MT Cheeseman,

I am transfixed meditating at your exquisite image!

& o comeon, now!

Will some body please hug and coddle Ms. Nel ?! Just maybe Janis Joplin's in her family tree (:

Have 'yall tried Coltrane's A-train on the PA?


within crepuscular light as the enlightenment remains in siege 

Comment by J.P. Hart on October 15, 2017 at 9:19am


Your microcosm of angst would be a revelatory interventional scenario for Dr. Phil.

I mean really, my great uncle died storming Iwo jima and now deep in the '17 i'm reading of Dame Nel weeping into dehydration?  It ain't right, Mike!

Can you cheer her up with your keyboards, maybe try Spirit in the Sky?  Patsy Kline's Life is a Mountain Railroad?

Dame Nel's been lonely too long. Please help her.




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