But today - it's a different story; caught off-guard pouring over the tabloids in the 10 items or less checkout line at the Piggly-Wiggly in Florida.
Who knew when or where she'd crack; she was so vulnerable.
But, when a tear dropped down on the divider between Melania's yogurt & rice cakes & Billy Bob's beer & condoms - the whole line listened-in to her...
Top Ten Whine List:
10. Donald didn't like my body language at the Inauguration...I was not signaling for help - 'the rain' that wasn't there went in my eye!
8. He threatened, "You're at the age where I trade them in" & I said, "I'm at the age where a Billion will be a starting number"!
7. He wants me wrapped in cellophane when he comes home on weekends & I said, "If you bring George Clooney with you"!
6. I told him I can't find my Immigration papers & he brought bricks for our bed!
5. I told him I didn't sign up for this - try living on $40 & clean marble all day & he said, "I know a Governor who'll do it for 30"!
4. He makes me wear Days of the Week panties so he can keep score - he says on Mondays he's Par!
2. He notices missing tiles in the Lincoln Tunnel but doesn't even mention I bought a 3rd Breast!
And #1 ....
I know what Russia has on him...he just doesn't know how to do small talk!
That one night in their homey dacha - he was itching & told Mrs. Putin "You have small pussy"!
This article can also be seen in Humor Times Magazine - but with dirtier pictures or - you can just imagine them.