Internet Abuzz Over Pence’s Catatonic Posture at Meeting

Internet Abuzz Over Pence’s Catatonic Posture at Meeting:  Vice President Mike Pence set social media on fire after he was observed during the President’s contentious meeting with Democratic congressional leaders for being so still - that many began wondering if he was actually a cardboard cutout.  Come on, give the poor guy a break - perhaps he was just in a (Mike) pensive mood.  Now my take is that Pence was simply praying Pelosi doesn’t "Basic Instinct" him during the meeting - after all, “mother” wasn’t there and we all know he’s not supposed to be in a room with women unless “mother” is accompanying him.

Excessive Screen Time Changes Children’s Brain Structures:  According to a landmark US study, young people who spend more than seven hours a day staring at a screen have different brain structures compared to the average child.  And that’s why it’s so important to provide your child with a device that has the highest screen resolution possible.  After all, you don’t want your child to grow up with only a 720P view of the world.

Climate Change Reduces Arctic Reindeer Population by Half:  A new report on the impact of climate change in the Arctic revealed that Arctic reindeer numbers have fallen from 5 million to just 2.1 million animals.  North Pole officials caution that if global warming isn’t addressed and reindeer numbers continue to decline, Santa may have no choice but to go with a self-driving sleigh this Christmas.  When asked to comment on the matter, Trump Acting EPA Director Andrew Wheeler said “ah come on, there ain’t no Santee Claus.”

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Comment by Tom Cordle on December 12, 2018 at 7:55am

How dare you attack President – er, Vice President Pence! Clearly this beloved, sainted, Christian patriarch and embodiment of Handmaid's Tale ethics – clearly, he was praying, praying that he can survive in the Valley of the Shadow of Drumpf.

Comment by alsoknownas on December 12, 2018 at 8:01am

There's a place in this little coastal town that sells Reindeer Jerky. I can't make myself try it.

Comment by Dicky Neely on December 12, 2018 at 9:21am

That was not really Pence in that meeting. It was an inflatable Ken doll! 

Re EPA Director Wheeler; There aint no Santa Claus but there sure is a Grinch!

Comment by J.P. Hart on December 12, 2018 at 10:05am

Finally caught the what's it? Final? Bipartisan donnybrook. Mental sign of the cross let me tell you, Johnny!

V.P. ventriloquist Pence~

I am still in need of two aspirin, bright sunny walk out-of-d00rs ~ some really opaque welder goggles and those Newman peppermints in the polar bear tin...


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