Caution: Writers at play

I had trouble coming up with a believable lie, so I asked my wife, “Tell me something that people would believe is true about me, but isn’t.”  She replied, “That you’re gay.” When I demurred, she said, “That you’re intelligent?”  Thanks for the help, dear. 

1. I’m an outspoken critic of people who use their cell phones while they drive.  Therefore, it’s ironic that a few years ago, I was pulled over by a cop for that very offense.  However, the cop let me go when I proved that my cell phone had not been in use, but in fact my left hand had been at my ear because I was picking at a scab. 

2. For several years, Jennifer Lopez’s mom Guadalupe lived in the building next to mine.  

3. Embarrassing moment: Two years ago, I was at a Mets game with a group of friends, but not with my wife. Between innings, the Kiss Cam zoomed in on me and the platonic woman friend sitting next to me and we had to kiss as if we were sweethearts. (Fortunately, my wife didn’t watch the game!)

 

Views: 219

Tags: can't, dare, free, handle, lies, or, set, shall, the, truth, More…you

Comment by JMac1949 Memories on November 26, 2012 at 4:25pm

I choose #3 because any husband inhis right mind would never take that chance... unless he had too many beers at the game.

Comment by Just Thinking... on November 26, 2012 at 4:35pm

Ha!  

Yeah, I'm going with #3 as the lie, too.    : )

Comment by Re Smith on November 26, 2012 at 4:43pm
I love #1, don't care if it is true or not.
Comment by Boanerges on November 26, 2012 at 5:05pm

Going with No. 3, although No. 1 seems almost to weird to be true.

Comment by L in the Southeast on November 26, 2012 at 5:18pm

I'm having a very hard time picturing this Kiss-Cam incident.  I think it's false.

Comment by Amy Abbott on November 26, 2012 at 5:21pm

I don't buy the whole Kiss Cam dealio.

Comment by Unbreakable on November 26, 2012 at 5:27pm
You're making this too easy. Has to be #3
Comment by Kim Gamble on November 26, 2012 at 5:29pm

You're gay.

You're married to a dear, honest woman.

I think #2 is a lie. Jennifer Lopez's mom is called Ethel.

Comment by Poor Woman on November 26, 2012 at 6:13pm

I'm guessing 3 can't be real, but something about it smacks of reality anyway.....

Shoot. I give up.

Comment by Kenneth Sibbett on November 26, 2012 at 6:54pm

Somehow, you pulled off #2. I don't want to know why, it would spoil the myth!

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