Chipotle Considering New Chain Called Better Burger: Chipotle Mexican Grill is rumored to be considering entering the hamburger business after filing a trademark application for the name "Better Burger.” This will come as welcome news for those who prefer to get their E. coli on a bun instead of a tortilla. Analysts say its about time the troubled chain branches out into other things, like Mad Cow Disease. That said, many food critics believe Chipotle should just stick to what they do best - which is food poisoning.
Report Finds Global Elderly Population Exploding: A new study argues that the number of people aged 65 and over will more than double globally by 2050 as the world's senior population continues to explode. Oh come on, this argument is getting really old.
Civil War Landmine Causes Evacuation of Arkansas Homes: After evacuating over 20 homes, police in Hot Springs, Arkansas are now looking for a place to explode a Civil War-era landmine that a local resident mistook for a cannonball and brought home with him. Well, I’ve always heard “the South shall rise again.” This might help send them along their way.