The wind was howling outside and the trees were swaying wildly. The crows were flying all around and I thought they were playing on the wind waves. My friend said he thought they were afraid of the wind and trying to find a safe place in all the turmoil. Two different views of the world and I prefer mine.
I have seen seagulls playing on the waves as they crashed to the beach. There was a bird riding the wind off the cliffs at the glider port and doing it over and over for the pure joy of it. Warm wind howls for fun. The wind likes to play.
Operating from fear in this life is such a limiting way to exist. When someone starts calculating all the risk factors of an action it is easy to become incapacitated. Frozen in an ice lake with only fear for a friend. Maybe that is why Hell is a lake of fire...molten and flowing, unafraid of taking a little heat.
When I see a rain storm pulling in I am happy to watch the clouds move around, becoming dark and pulling at my life with raindrops splashing on my head. I have lived in rain forests and deserts and I like them both. I am not afraid of a rain storm or even a snow storm. What will fear give you? Nothing. Embracing life is the only way to live.
When my friend and I were eating outside one hot afternoon the sun dipped beneath our shade umbrella and got hot. Fear of being too warm grabbed at him and he had to move quickly out into a more even temperature spot. I can see moving when you are too hot but not out of fear. You move because it is just time. You don't run away to escape something you make changes because it just happens.
A life ruled by fear becomes smaller with the years and a life lived embracing all the elements expands. I have been afraid. I know fear and it is necessary sometimes but it is when you put fear first that it gets complicated. Another friend of mine is so afraid of losing money that she has bound herself to a man who makes her feel lousy. Just the thought of that makes me want to jump into the lake of fire.
Hanging on to something that seems to be secure is an illusion. If you expect perfect temperatures, relationships and living situations you will be disappointed. Sometimes you will find the perfect place and it gets boring. Things that frighten us are important and ignite our minds to wonder.
A good thunder clap makes me energetic. It is fun to hide and run around with lots of drama. Dogs have a fear reaction to fireworks and cower in the corner to escape. I have had war dreams where I was peeking out on to a scene of carnage hoping "they" wouldn't find me. Fear can paralyze you for life. Trauma.
Tsunamis, earthquakes and droughts haunt our collective memories. HIV, Cancer, Hepatitis and Dementia are things we shrink from and fear. When the times get tough the tough get going and the weak run away. Hiding under the blankets is my favorite place to be sometimes. Overcoming fear and crawling out into the fray is a great feeling. It is the stuff movies are made from.
This life stuff isn't for wusses.