The first three are in the works - the last of them is a major fail that I keep beating to shit...I don't think it's finished although it might be because I may have killed the shit out of it.
I've actually liked it in each incarnation but the next day I look and I think "UGH". I KNOW that's because the color sinks and it will be fine when I varnish...but if I'm honest, there's SOMEthing missing so I keep beating it. ("fine" never works for me.) (if I don't think it's extraordinary in some way, I will keep looking for the extraordinary until I think I hit it. even if it means total destructo.) I SHOULD start another painting - that's what I SHOULD do.
so you see, I KNOW what to do. I just don't do it.
this first is an old self portrait that I had liked but never finished, then some years later, I threw a glaze over it, but got screwed up in the glaze drying stage, so it went into a corner for about 35 years and I forgot about it until every time we moved. recently I stumbled on it again and said to myself, "self, you can do something with this." and put it in a closer corner to not forget it. last week I pulled it out of the corner and after looking at Munch, decided I should be a vampire. so here we go. vampyre. woop!
I like it a lot. I hope I don't fuck it up. I find Munch very helpful.
this is a larger canvas - it's a healthy size - not huge...I used to paint gigantic canvases and spent a fortune on paint but no more although it looks like I might be working my way up again.
anyway this one's an ode to Frank Mason who I studied with for a little while (look him up - particularly his still lifes) (yummy). he was a great painter - not really my style - too baroque and fussy but damn, he was all about the brushwork and studying with him in vermont was like taking a drama class....really. I got to share a ski chalet with a bunch of painters for a month...total drama junkies, total fun, a mess of artsy people are always very sexy. no sex to speak of but...okay....fun. I need to take a better picture...I was getting a lot of reflective light so color and detail is lost.
THE FOLLOWING IS NOT A GOOD PAINTING. Although it might be. I might have to scrub off everything and start again. I might stick it in a corner and hide it from myself.
I like this today.
latest version - subject to change
BELOW: other versions from earliest to the one before this one or something...there have been about 10 different versions going from loose to tigher and crazier. I don't think I mind that but I don't know...I'm looking for SOMEthing...when it happens I know. I might have stormed right past "it" with this one though.