"I begin with an idea, but as I work, the picture takes over. Then there is the struggle between the idea I preconceived... and the picture that fights for its own life." -Georg Baselitz 

the above is very true for me.  always has been.  painting is a struggle and over the last few months I have pretty much grappled with the craziness of what is determined to be painted.  in the course of all this it occurred to me that I can't help but express my feelings about politics.  because whether I like it or not, politics is life.  and I have such a powerful sense of  unease, not specifically because of the idiot but yes, largely because the idiot has colored and tainted so much of our beautiful country.  he inspires hate and fear and adulation and idiocy.  we will probably endure, but who knows?

it feels as if I'm creating chaos. if you don't look too closely, these might be considered pretty but they're not what they seem.  there are few actual flowers in them.  I start with flowers but that's not what I want to say.  flowers are pretty...they can be metaphors for age and sexuality, not to mention nature, color, form. 

but if you look closely, these are mostly just colors and suggestion and shadow and form.  so I think of them as unstill lifes because I feel unstill and uneasy and they are unstill and unexpected and I've been trying to understand why I want to paint like this for months.  I start with a picture of what I see but that's not what I want to say.  yet, I'm drawn to these flowers - maybe as a start.  I only just figured how to get out of the way and let a painting happen but nevertheless I can't help my desire to define and make something sure.  but sureness doesn't satisfy me.  what is sure?  if you look closely, what's there is not pretty or defined.   

well the nyc bridge painting is pretty I think, but it's hard to see it. I keep trying to take a picture at the wrong time of day, only I can't figure what is the right time of the day because my finish is very high gloss and reflects the light.  still, my husband is happy because the guy is tall.  so it's us.  of course, it's not, but I get a kick out of the romantic aspect of it.  and I love him enough that I have worked on this painting for months - taking it from a day painting to a night painting - just to create something that pleases only him.  me, too.  

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Comment by Ron Powell on May 23, 2018 at 12:28pm

I edit so much that I often throw the sequence of comment and response off track...

Comment by koshersalaami on May 23, 2018 at 2:19pm

 I’ll write a long comment and other stuff will happen in the meantime. It’s rare that I delete a comment and edit it and repost it after the response to it. 

Comment by koshersalaami on May 23, 2018 at 2:34pm

If improvising music - and I played rock n roll last week for the first time in I think over half a year - the difference in creating is how fast it has to happen. I don’t start out knowing where I’m going. It gets more complicated because it depends if I’ve got the keyboard on an organ or a piano setting (or occasionally clav, but not last week) because in that case I have to take into account that different approaches fit better on each keyboard. 

Of course, not only don’t I know what I’m about to do, but afterward I often don’t have a clear memory of what I did. I was too busy creating it while trying to keep it within certain parameters. It’s a little like juggling - actually, maybe more like driving a race car on an unfamiliar track. When I start a long run, I don’t yet know how I’m going to finish it in the right key - the wrong key would be the equivalent of driving off the road. I adjust when I get close. 

Sometimes it’s convincing. Last week a guy said “You’ve clearly done that before.” It was organ on Evil Ways. Actually, I don’t think I’d ever played Evil Ways with a band before, I just know how it goes. 

Comment by Ron Powell on May 23, 2018 at 2:54pm

@Kosh;  Many times I have  edited a.comment and reposted without realizing that a response has been posted ahead of my edit...When that happens I leave the irina in place warts and all if I haven't already deleted it....

Re the creating during a session....

You've captured the essence of the experience...

Comment by alsoknownas on May 23, 2018 at 3:14pm

Studs Terkel asked Sonny Terry one time about describing his emotions when playing, which resulted in an answer along these lines: " Oh man. I don't know nothin' 'bout that. I just let my harmonica do my talkin' for me."

He then broke into a 12 bar solo that showed there wasn't any need for words.

Comment by Ron Powell on May 23, 2018 at 11:19pm
Comment by Rita Shibr on June 12, 2018 at 6:46am

Wow.  I mean just gorgeous.  I love the effect of being "drenched" in beautiful hues.. this is just so beautiful Monkey.  I am so sorry I missed this.  I don't really like the new page,  I like to see whats happening for real not the compartments but I am grateful to be able to come here.

You are so talented,  the writing and the art.  And your marvelous self woman!  Love and hug over the fence here in Pa.  xox 

Comment by Rita Shibr on June 12, 2018 at 6:47am

Do you ever have shows or sell your work... just loving all but especially the MOON ..

Comment by Foolish Monkey on June 12, 2018 at 7:48am
wow...I'm blushing. thanks rita.

I need to put together more current work to show a gallery, then I'll give boston a shot. the only issue is I work= slow but consistently so I think I'll be ready post summer...maybe this coming winter. need to do research to find a gallery that would be a good fit for me and my work.

RE: the moon - it came last btw...painting was originally a day painting but hubbins made sad noises about the guy being short and he being tall (he figured the couple had to be us) (actually, truth be told originally it was me alone - no partner, just me dancing wildly under the bridge but I kind of thought she looked too alone so I gave her a partner. who was short. and now he's tall. so it pleased him so now the painting is my husband and I - two people who haven't looked like that in about a hundred years.)

anyway getting back to the moon - with a painting, once you change something EVERYTHING changes...and I needed to accommodate the new guy so the sunset kind of started talking and then it needed to get darker and bluer and I was liking this and at some point - out came the moon. I love that moon myself. it's very evocative.
Comment by Rita Shibr on June 13, 2018 at 1:19am

So sweet for you husband,  you are a good wifey....I love that you made him taller. 


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