Sebastian Gorka Always Carries 2 Guns And Tourniquet: A firearms publication called Recoil recently published a profile and a picture of items that Sebastian Gorka - the controversial former Trump aide - routinely carries around on him, which includes two firearms, a Butane lighter, a mini copy of the Constitution and a tourniquet.
One thing’s for sure, that tourniquet is gonna come in real handy when he accidentally shoots himself in the penis after stuffing all those firearms down his pants. And that tiny flashlight should be helpful in assisting him to find his penis afterward. Now, about the only question that remains to be answered is - where the hell is his rape whistle and his bottle of “Low-T Pills?”
Sounds to me like Mr. Gorka really wants to be known as a man you don’t wanna to mess with at those holiday sales events at Target stores. That said, I still don’t quite get why he’s carrying around that mini-Constitution. I mean, do you really need a copy of the Constitution to remember to say “I plead the fifth?”