Johnny Robish's Blog – September 2018 Archive (27)

President Trump Says He and Kim Jong-Un Fell in Love

President Trump Says He and Kim Jong-Un Fell in Love:  President Donald Trump told a rally of his followers in Wheeling, West Virginia that he and North Korean leader Kim Jong-un “fell in love” over the course of their on-again off-again detente, adding that Kim wrote him the most “beautiful…

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Added by Johnny Robish on September 30, 2018 at 7:21pm — 5 Comments

Trump Tells Fake History of Democratic Party at Wheeling Rally:  Fact checkers are once again shaking their heads in disbelief after President Trump delivered a really bizarre, totally fake history o…

Trump Tells Fake History of Democratic Party at Wheeling Rally:  Fact checkers are once again shaking their heads in disbelief after President Trump delivered a really bizarre, totally fake history of the Democratic Party’s name to a group of followers at a Saturday night rally in Wheeling, West…

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Added by Johnny Robish on September 29, 2018 at 9:26pm — 14 Comments

Eerie Skull-Shaped Asteroid to Zoom Past Earth after Halloween

Eerie Skull-Shaped Asteroid to Zoom Past Earth after Halloween:  The internet is going bonkers after NASA announced that a ghoulish-looking asteroid, which resembles a human skull, is scheduled to fly past Earth - right after Halloween.

I’ll tell you…

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Added by Johnny Robish on September 28, 2018 at 8:00pm — 1 Comment

Kavanaugh Hearing Making Some Take Defensive Measures

Kavanaugh Hearing Making Some Take Defensive Measures:  In light of the recent testimony in the Kavanaugh hearings, I thought it might be prudent to make a preemptive strike and post a picture of me along with a reputable female who has agreed to vouch for the uncommonly high moral standards I maintained while in high school back in Canton, Ohio. …

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Added by Johnny Robish on September 27, 2018 at 7:45pm — 4 Comments

Trump Urged Spain to Build Wall Across the Sahara Desert

Trump Urged Spain to Build Wall Across the Sahara Desert:  Spain’s foreign minister revealed that US President Donald Trump suggested the Spanish government tackle the Mediterranean migration crisis by emulating one of his most famous proclamations of building a wall - suggesting that Spain build…

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Added by Johnny Robish on September 26, 2018 at 8:42pm — 9 Comments

Dunkin’ Drops Donuts From its Name

Dunkin’ Drops Donuts From its Name:  Restaurant chain Dunkin’ Donuts announced it’s dropping the word “Donuts” from its name and renaming itself simply “Dunkin’,” which will align itself with the company’s emphasis on coffee and other beverages.  In related news, Starbucks announced they will be dropping the “Star” part of their name and simply calling themselves…

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Added by Johnny Robish on September 25, 2018 at 8:22pm — 2 Comments

Amazon Announces New Alexa-Controlled Microwave Oven

Amazon Announces New Alexa-Controlled Microwave Oven:  Amazon has officially gotten into the kitchen appliance market with its new $59.99 Alexa-controlled microwave oven.  Analysts say its the perfect item those who feel that having to push three or four buttons to cook a meal is just way too much work.  Unfortunately,…

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Added by Johnny Robish on September 24, 2018 at 8:01pm — 7 Comments

Hurricane Florence Leaves Thousands of Dead Fish on I-40

Hurricane Florence Leaves Thousands of Dead Fish on I-40:  Authorities report that the massive flooding caused by Hurricane Florence has resulted in thousands of dead fish washing up onto Interstate 40, leaving behind a horrible stench when the flood waters finally receded.…

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Added by Johnny Robish on September 23, 2018 at 8:14pm — 5 Comments

Scientists Identify Earth's Oldest Known Animal Fossils

Scientists Identify Earth's Oldest Known Animal Fossils:  Scientists have used fat molecules to solve a longstanding mystery and identify an ancient creature who lived 558 million years ago called Dickinsonia, thought to be the first complex “multi-cellular” organisms on Earth.  Gee, multi-cellular organisms?  I had no idea…

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Added by Johnny Robish on September 22, 2018 at 8:01pm — No Comments

Pulp Free Orange Juice Issues

Pulp Free Orange Juice Issues:  Bought a carton of orange juice that claimed the juice was "pulp free." When I poured the juice into a glass, pulp came out just as always. I'm thinking what the hell is this, pulp fiction?…

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Added by Johnny Robish on September 21, 2018 at 8:34pm — 2 Comments

Outbreak Linked to Contact with Puppies

Outbreak Linked to Contact with Puppies:  The US Centers for Disease Control has linked puppies to a nationwide, drug-resistant, stomach bug outbreak.  Now come on!  I can live with having to refrain from drugs, alcohol, tobacco, fatty foods and even coffee, but my friends, when they start warning us about the dangers of…

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Added by Johnny Robish on September 20, 2018 at 8:24pm — 3 Comments

Police Arrest Man for Groping Fast-Food Worker

Police Arrest Man for Groping Fast-Food Worker:  Police in central Pennsylvania say they found a suspected groper of a fast-food worker by following a trail of the curly fries he left behind.  When confronted by police, the man claimed he was just only trying to get a good feel for the service there.…

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Added by Johnny Robish on September 19, 2018 at 8:30pm — 4 Comments

Pimples Are Now In and Becoming the Latest Craze

Pimples Are Now In and Becoming the Latest Craze:  Celebrities and bloggers are going bare-faced on social media as more of the trendy folks are joining the acne positivity movement and Teen Vogue has even launched the inaugural Acne awards.  Its about time!  I knew all this acne stuff would eventually come to a head.…

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Added by Johnny Robish on September 18, 2018 at 8:30pm — No Comments

Elon Musk and SpaceX Reveal First Private Moon Tourist

Elon Musk and SpaceX Reveal First Private Moon Tourist:  SpaceX has just announced that Japanese billionaire Yusaku Maezawa will be the world’s first private passenger to fly around the Moon, paying an estimated $35 million to travel aboard a BFR launch vehicle in 2023 - which SpaceX feels will…

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Added by Johnny Robish on September 17, 2018 at 8:13pm — No Comments

Some Still Pushing to Have Pluto Reinstated as a Planet

Some Still Pushing to Have Pluto Reinstated as a Planet:  Ever since the International Astronomical Union (IAU) demoted Pluto from planet status to “dwarf planet,” there have been those who’ve been steadily pushing back, trying to get Pluto re-classified as a planet again.  My feeling has always been that maybe after we’re certain Pluto has learned its lesson and paid…

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Added by Johnny Robish on September 16, 2018 at 7:30pm — 12 Comments

Worker Killed After Falling Into Meat Blender

Worker Killed After Falling Into Meat Blender:  A 41-year-old man has died after falling into a running meat blender at an Oregon meat-processing plant which has been repeatedly cited for safety violations.  Gee, sort of makes you long for the good old days when inspectors were only finding things like traces of horse meat or rat dung in meat.…

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Added by Johnny Robish on September 14, 2018 at 9:07pm — 4 Comments

Astronomers Find Black Holes Swallow and Then Burp Up Stars

Astronomers Find Black Holes Swallow and Then Burp Up Stars:  Astronomers have discovered black holes don't just “eat” stars, but they also “burp” them back up as stellar ghosts.  They burp them up?  Well, I can’t say I’m really surprised, after all, everyone knows they eat these stars way too fast.…

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Added by Johnny Robish on September 13, 2018 at 8:20pm — 4 Comments

Amateur Artist Botches Restoration of Ancient Jesus Sculpture

Amateur Artist Botches Restoration of Ancient Jesus Sculpture:  The art world is expressing shock and outrage after learning that yet another Amateur artist in the Asturias region of Spain convinced church officials to let her restore an ancient 15th century sculpture of Mary and Jesus - and then…

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Added by Johnny Robish on September 12, 2018 at 7:42pm — 9 Comments

Trump Calls His Puerto Rico Response An Unsung Success

Trump Calls His Puerto Rico Response An Unsung Success:  As Hurricane Florence bears down on the Carolinas, President Trump is describing his administration’s response to Hurricane Maria in Puerto Rico as “an incredible unsung success,” despite the fact that the death toll has jumped from 64 to…

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Added by Johnny Robish on September 11, 2018 at 10:45pm — 4 Comments

Son Sues Cryonics Firm for $1 Million Over Decapitating Father’s Head

Son Sues Cryonics Firm for $1 Million Over Decapitating Father’s Head:  A son is suing the cryonics firm Alcor for one million dollars for not respecting his late father’s wishes (and contract) to have his “entire body” cryogenically preserved.  Instead,…

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Added by Johnny Robish on September 10, 2018 at 7:09pm — No Comments

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