Monique Colver's Blog (9)

The Last Good Daughter

Welcome to yet another Happy Suicide Prevention Month!

I’ve been looking at suicides, because, y’know, hobby, and it’s heartbreaking how many people think there’s no other option. They’re so beaten down, or in so much pain, or they’re at the end of their rope (sometimes literally, which is a terrible joke), or something. There are so many young people who don’t know yet, and some people never do figure it out, that most of what seems so painful is bullshit. The world is full of…


Added by Monique Colver on September 21, 2015 at 1:55pm — 5 Comments

A Friday Story: an Early Lies Essay

I love Fridays. I’m not sure why, since I often end them by saying to self, “Self, you didn’t get enough done, and now you’re going to have to work tomorrow!”

I don’t always work tomorrow when I say I will, but I’ve had some health issues that have been annoying me and I use them as an excuse. I’m all about using excuses to get out of work.

I’m also all about calling myself lazy when I’m not, but that goes back to some of the early lies, the ones where I was told I was lazy and…


Added by Monique Colver on November 15, 2013 at 1:27pm — 1 Comment

A Stepfather's Death

Recently I attended a funeral for a lovely man who married my mother years ago. Then they buried him next to my mother.

We didn’t get along well for many years – by the time I met him I was already married, and living overseas, so it’s not as if knew him as a stepfather. When I had first called my mother and told her I was getting married (at the altogether unreasonable age of 19 to a man I barely knew), my mother, who was in a relationship with the man she would later marry (we can…


Added by Monique Colver on September 22, 2013 at 12:05pm — 5 Comments

It's Been Awhile

It is now May of 2013 and somehow the last six months just slipped away, falling down the slippery slope of life. Isn’t that always the way?

Not always, of course. It’s just a phrase I like to throw in to pretend I’m saying something profound when I’m not.

We spent much of the winter running a doggie hospice, which in itself was exhausting, but what else are you going to do? When the dog in question gets to be 15 and just can’t keep up her end of the agreement, made when she…


Added by Monique Colver on May 6, 2013 at 8:26pm — No Comments

My Terrifying Experience

Perhaps my story isn’t nearly as horrible as what’s happened recently to . . . well, anyone who isn’t me, but it was horrible for me, and really, I’m not sure what else matters.

Of course, I love you all and hope that whatever’s going on is quickly resolved.

But back to me.…


Added by Monique Colver on November 9, 2012 at 12:17pm — 8 Comments

Waiting for Inspiration

How To Be A Writer.5

(Fifth in the series)

Don’t mind me. I’m just sitting here waiting for inspiration to strike so I can get on with it. I’m also waiting for a chocolate cake to materialize in front of me. There’s about as much chance of that happening so I might as well.

While I’m at it, the waiting part, I shall also be waiting patiently for some magical weight loss, and maybe some cookies.

Occasionally I am struck by inspiration, but it’s usually at an…


Added by Monique Colver on October 6, 2012 at 6:20pm — 2 Comments

The Color of Light

I tried capturing it in jars, first a Hellman’s mayonnaise, not only rinsed out, but scoured, cleaned within an inch of its life. Outside was the crisp light of early fall, the trees not yet turning but on the verge. The sky bright with free floating dreams, the kind that rarely float close enough to catch. I stood underneath the pear tree where the light was subdued, and I held up my jar, as high as I could reach, and the light flowed in. It filled my jar, stopping just short of the…


Added by Monique Colver on September 30, 2012 at 6:20pm — 3 Comments


               I KNOW! I’m pretty excited myself, so I can imagine how you’re feeling about it.

               Granted, you don’t care much, but you must understand what a big deal this is. Not that you’ll care more, but just so you know: it is very difficult for me to find pants. Oh sure, they’re in stores everywhere, but none of them fit me. They’re too short, or the butt sags, or they’re too short.

               Mostly what I’m saying is, they’re too short. Or the butts…


Added by Monique Colver on September 25, 2012 at 8:50pm — 5 Comments

I Used To Be Funny

Humor is so subjective. People used to think I was funny. Then I wrote this damn book.

Suddenly I'm not funny anymore.

I've had people start reading the book in front of me, while I'm standing there, which makes me uncomfortable, but I feel awkward saying, "Don't read it NOW! I'm right here!" So they start reading it, and they laugh.

This is true.

This is good.

I want people to laugh. All I want to do is entertain people.

But people who haven't read…


Added by Monique Colver on September 8, 2012 at 9:53pm — 7 Comments



Posted by J.P. Hart on May 19, 2019 at 1:33pm 1 Comment

The Final Frontier

Posted by Robert B. James on May 19, 2019 at 7:34am 2 Comments

More Notes To Self

Posted by Robert B. James on May 18, 2019 at 7:32am 2 Comments


Posted by Steel Breeze on May 18, 2019 at 5:31am 7 Comments

Spun Dry

Posted by Robert B. James on May 17, 2019 at 7:00am 3 Comments

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